The date: Friday 23rd August, 2002

The time: Brunch

The reason: Hardcore helluvatoughness with the Bren Gun

It was a day like any other. Terry was picking and licking, Coffee was comparing sizes with Larry, and apparently Coffee was winning... badly...

I had come back from doing my house patrol. I did it every day the whole summer long. I have no idea why, I think it was either an attempt at catharsis, or just a way of keeping to my stable weight of 15 stones while also making myself super strong for all the ladies once I made my escape from the house. I could, you know, even with the Bren Gun. I mean, sling it to my back, climb up the wall, lay the beatdown on all the nasty guard robots.... booyah...

So anyways, I rested my gear, took my boots off, and sat down to some entertainment. We had locked Cathy and Christine in the room and I had carved myself a little hole to watch. Big enough for 3, so it was me, Paul and Sedgers watching the excitement. However, it was cut short....

A scream. A violent, putrid, scream of screams. Screamerific I might add.

I sprinted from the little carved room, leaving the two men watching the girls. I was going to miss out, gawd dangit... Anyway. I ran, ran like the frickin wind. And I fear to this day what I saw....

KEEP ME IN THE HOUSE TO FIND OUT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE ONLY MEN LEFT IN THE ROOM, A BREN GUN AND SOME OF THAT SCARY CHOCOLATE!!!