Firstly...if I let one person out of the house for the World's Biggest Dick contest I'll have to let you all go as I've never come across such a bunch of big dicks as I have as far as the inmates of this blog are concerned. However...I'm sure a bit of time off for good behaviour wouldn't go amiss.
Secondly...judging by the lacksadaisical blogging of the cellmates recently I suspect that the contest may have drawn to a close by Sept 16th because I'll be booting everyone of your lazy good-for-nothing bar stewards off the board long before then!
Thirdly, say hello to Guy for me and please remind him that he still owes me a fiver for the carton of Lambert and Butler I sent him. As far as attending Guy's golfing meet goes, I have actually asked him in the past to hold his tournament in Royal Lytham and St Annes...which is just up the coast from me and would be a much better venue than his usual course. Unfortunately he just made some excuse about the Amazing Kreskin being scared of flying and therefore couldn't change venue. Pathetic excuse if you ask me. He just doesn't want to coff up for those fags, that's all.
Fourthly...why take two penises into the shower when you can just take one...a regular python of a member with anti-lock brakes and revolving bellend. For more details please visit The Home of The Mighty Hughes One-Eyed Trouser Snake...and don't forget to bring a bottle and a bird.
Not-So-Big-Brother
